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How Guys Compare Their Junk [FBHW]

Robert Cianflone, Getty Images

Free Beer pulled out an important topic this morning and laid it on the table for analysis. What followed was a serious, thoughtful discussion among everyone on a very important issue in the male community – how do guys compare the size of their junk?

Free Beer had a list to read from that contained the top four ways that guys go about stacking their manhood up against one another. But first, he asked if anyone wanted to guess what might be on the list.

Hot Wings guessed that the “urinal side glance” could be a tactic that many guys use, while Zane commented that “whenever I come across a big honker, it’s usually in the locker room.” The guys then cracked up as Zane went on to tell a silly story that reinforced a certain well-known stereotype.

Free Beer eventually got around to reading the list. Here it is, in reverse order:

  • 4th place – Watching pornography
    The guys all agreed that this was a terrible way to compare yourself to other men. Stiff competition indeed.
  • 3rd place – Whipping it out and comparing it with friends
    Free Beer saved this one for last, because he thought it was the most ludicrous. Everyone agreed, saying they all didn’t know anybody who would ever do this. The guys joked that the people polled for this list must have been dumb athletes.
  • 2nd place – Asking women how they compare with other guys they’ve seen
    Everyone also agreed that this was another method that seemed ill-advised. You are just setting yourself up for some trouble.
  • 1st place – Researching online for data
    Free Beer got a unanimous consensus with this one, because really… every guy has done this at least once, right? Right?!

Do you compare your junk? How do you do it? Leave a comment below and let us know!

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